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Being honest with ourselves
May 13, 2013

As we think about it, it is clear that there are shades of honesty. This is because the answer to a question is very rarely a straight yes or no. And so we can omit detail, tell white lies or be too lazy to ponder over the degree to which we could really be honest, if we were really being honest and telling no lies at all. And then again we could appreciate that there is no such thing as complete honesty – as the truth is in the eyes of the beholder. That we will all have our own truth.

Finally though and this for me is the clincher, we have to decide how honest we will be with ourselves? How happy we are to delude and dissemble to ourselves, to make excuses, to have our very own lawyer on tap to defend us (to ourselves) and to take comfort in how special we really are? It is believed by the experts that a little bit of dishonesty and delusion is a good thing for our emotional health (optimism rather than realism they call it) but I am not happy with that.

We should not judge ourselves good or bad, but to be honest to ourselves – our motives, our weaknesses, the tricks we play and our barely acknowledge patterns – well that has to be in our interest?

best wishes

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Andrew Richardson

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