One incredibly important resource is your Imagination

The sight and feel of better futures could be the motivation which will enable you to realize these better futures. Let your mind wander free. Where would you like to be in a say a year’s time or less than that or a little more - how would it look and feel. See yourself there. What are you wearing, how are you conducting yourself. And who is with you and how are they reacting to you? Are they impressed or pleased? And where are you? See something clearly – can you touch it? And how might you reach it?

Or it could be that for you it is the fears of a bad future that could motivate you away in the opposite direction.

Or there could be a time or period in your past – either very good or very bad that can move you towards something good or again away from something you would rather avoid.

Stay with whatever come up and know that this could be the very power you are looking for to move you and from this you will see the outline of a path to travel on.

And your conscious, rational mind allows you to find the best solutions to your problems.

What would you tell a friend to do if they were in your situation?
What is the best rational advice you could give them …. And give you? And what would a close friend be advising you right now?

And there is your ability to 'know’ intuitively

We all understand the infinite variety of the world by seeing it as being ‘like’ something else and this ‘like’ is stored as a pattern in our unconscious memory bank. And as we make a connection with this pattern - an emotion will arise to communicate to you – intuitively if you like that word – so that you can make sense of it.

And you can just begin to open to these feelings and to recognise them and to see if you can catch the pattern match – like the essence of a tantalizingly beautiful scent. And you can do this best when you are relaxed and calm like now – then your emotions can really speak to you.

Or are some memories and emotions disturbing and uncontrollable. Then specific extra work is needed.

And you have Complex long term memory and your capacity to undertake complex tasks is enormous.

What are you most proud of? Reach down to this proud feeling and be ready to re-use it. It could be your children or a relationship or an achievement or a skill you have developed/p>or something residing in a special memory.

What are your qualifications – as a graduate or a teacher or in business or a profession or as a mother or a friend or a gardener or a handyman? And do you have a piece of paper that states your qualification or does your qualification come from your experience of life. It doesn’t really matter.

And what of that ability to empathise and connect with others?

It just happens automatically – your mirror neurons connecting with and feeding back from all who cross your path. There is a complex dance – as facial expressions and bodies react and lead. And it is this barely recognizable dance that keeps you connected to others – for work, play, attention, intimacy and just connection – whether fleeting and sudden or long lasting and deep.

Do you sense or believe that it needs augmenting – are you shy, restrictive and fearful in company>

And you can if you choose, step back or above yourselves and move into your observing self

Imagine – it is just like stepping outside yourself and looking on — to be that part of you that is aware of itself as a unique centre of awareness

In your observing self, you will see your situation more calmly and in a more detached manner and so find different perspectives and solutions. How could you look at your situation differently? How would it be if you stood a mile away or at the top of a mountain or from a different future a year from now or a past of a year ago?

And of course we all dream even if we often cannot remember our dreams

Dreaming keeps our emotions working well by allowing us to let go of the emotions that came up that day and are still there – unresolved and festering away. Dreaming dissolves the emotion as a circle is completed - by acting the emotion out in our dreaming imagination.

As you observe your emotions now – some strong or weak or positive or dissatisfied - you can choose to take comfort from the knowledge of your innate and extensive capacities and resources – even if they may appear to be hidden from you at this time.

And decide where you can work to enhance resources – either on your own or together with a good counsellor.

1. How have you managed to keep going, in spite of everything?
2. Which of your strong points have you used to do this?
3. What have you tried which did not work and what are you thinking of next?
4. When you overcome your troubles, what will you be doing that is different?
5. What would you like to do in the future that you find difficult or impossible now
6. And what will you wish to keep from your current life?
What would have to happen in this therapy for it to be worthwhile?

Miracle question
Imagine a fairy sprinkled fairy dust on you while you slept tonight and tomorrow when you awoke your problem had disappeared.

• How will you know that the problem has gone?
• What will the future look like without the problem?
• How will your friends and family know?

Seeing it different

1. Where have you developed the idea you or your problem cannot change. How can you challenge that?
2. What are you typically paying attention to in the situation?
3. What does this focus distract you from or what else could you be paying attention to?
4. Do you focus on the past, present or future? How can you shift to another time orientation?
5. Where do you feel in control and where do you feel out of control?
6. How can you shift your orientation toward more control or less control?
7. Where might it be helpful to accept rather than change?
8. Where could attaining a sense of gratitude or appreciation help you in your problem situation?
9. How could you see the bigger picture, get a broader perspective, or narrow your focus to something smaller.

Breaking Patterns

1. What are some repeating results in your life or relationships that frustrate you?
2. What is the smallest change you could make in your problem situation that might make a difference?
3. Where in the problem situation do you keep repeating some pattern of action you could change?