In the days before we drove around in cars, and flew in planes, a horseman rode into a clearing, beside a river, wondering where he could tether his horse. Looking around, he found a pole, dug a hole and tramped it firmly into the ground. With that he went to the waters edge and took a drink , then, before leaving, thought to himself,” I will leave the pole in the ground, and another horsemen who comes along will also have some where to tie his horse.”

The next visitor was not a horseman, but a traveller who had happened to be walking through the same area. Coming to the clearing where the pole was stuck in the middle of the trail she thought to herself “if people come by in the night they could walk straight into this”. Acting out of concern for others, she pulled the pole out of the ground and threw it aside.

A day or two later, a fisherman was walking down to the river to cast his line when he saw the pole at the side of the clearing. He picked it up and carried it down to the bank where he used it as a seat to raise his body above the muddy soil. When he was about to leave he too acted out of consideration “I will leave this pole here,” he thought. “Any other fishermen coming down to the bank will also have a dry place on which to sit and cast his line.”

A short while later a boat and rower came down the river looking for somewhere, to hitch his boat. He saw the pole on the embankment, nosed his bow into the shore and, like the horseman, dug a hole and inserted the pole so that he could safely moor his boat. On departing, he displayed consideration for other boatmen by leaving the pole embedded in the bank as a future convenient mooring post.

The next passer by was a woodsman, looking for firewood. He spotted the pole on the river bank and saw it a fine piece of dry firewood that would keep him and his family warm for a good few hours. And with that he heaved it out of the ground and carried home.

Each traveller treated the pole with good intent and in consideration of his or her fellow travellers. Each had found a practical use for the pole. Each traveller was different, each perceived the pole differently and, because of their perceptions, each took a different course of action. Who can say which if any of them were right?

There was an old man who lived with his wife on the edge of a town a long time ago and it was his custom to walk into the town each morning to have a coffee in the square. Now on this particular morning as he walked along the familiar path into the town he happened to glance down and noticed something glistening in front of him. He stooped down and picked up an old coin. The coin was not of the country he lived in and he thought perhaps it might be from the country that neighboured his. Anyway he picked it up and walked on.

Now as he was sitting down in the café and enjoying the warm sun, a stranger sat down beside him. He was in a hurry and having to leave the country quickly and was desperate for coins he could use at his destination in the neighbouring country. And he took the coin from our old man and in exchange gave him three silver coins. As luck would have it, a man at the next table had overhead this exchange and came over and said that he was a silversmith looking for silver to complete an urgent commission. And he would give the old man three gold pieces for those three silver pieces.

As you can imagine, after the delight and surprise of this, our old friend was even happier relaxing in the square. But, there was more adventure for him as you will not be surprised to know. Another man rushed into the café in a state of distress saying that he was desperate for wealth that he could put in his pocket - gold coins would be best. So much so that he would exchange his warehouse full of blankets if he could find just threegold coins. And as he was waving the deeds of the warehouse in front of him, our old friend got up,went with the stranger to just beyond the edge of the square to inspect the warehouse and found himself, before he knew it, the proud owner of an amazing new facility. And before he could even begin to contemplate what this new situation might mean for him, a king’s representative rode into town – proclaiming that the country was at war and the king needed to buy provisions for his soldiers and horses – including blankets. The old man spoke up and after inspecting the warehouse, the king’s soldier gave the old man two bags of gold in exchange.

It was time to go home and the man arose, placing the bags in his inside jacket pocket and walked happily back to his house. But he did not know that he was being followed – by a couple of ruffians that had seen everything that had happened that morning. And as he approached his house, with his wife waiting at the gate to greet him, these two scoundrels, jumped on him, threw him to the ground and took the gold. Luckily the old man was not seriously hurt and he stumbled up and to his wife. ‘How are you husband’ she asked with alarm ‘and what was it that those two men took from you?’ ‘Yes I am fine, my dear wife and those men – well they took nothing – just an old coin.'

When you are going to have a baby, its like planning a fabulous vacation trip to Italy - after months of anticipation , the big day finally arrives. The plane lands and the flight attendant announces - "welcome to Holland". You say - "what do you mean - Holland? I signed up for Italy. I am supposed to be in Italy"

All my life I have dreamed of going to Italy! But there has been a change in the flight plan, the plane has landed in Holland, and there you must stay. The important thing is - they haven't taken you to some horrible or disgusting place, its just a different place. So, you must go out and buy some new guide books, you must learn a whole new language, and you will meet a whole group of new people you would never have met. Its just a different place, its slower paced than Italy. But after you have been there for a while, you catch your breath, you begin to notice Holland has windmills, has tulips and Holland even has Rembrandts!

But everyone you know is going and coming from Italy, and bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say " yes, that’s where I supposed to go, that's what I'd planned." And the pain and disappointment will never go away, because the loss of that dream is a very significant loss.

But if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, and very unique, and the very lovely things about Holland.